5 Ways to De-Stress in a Highly Stressful Moment

(3 minute read)

It happens more often than we would like: a deadline that is approaching quicker than we anticipated, a family argument that is making our blood boil, a toddler that just will not stop whining.

Stressful moments come and go almost every day and collectively they can have a profound negative impact on our physical and mental health. The good news is that we can adopt simple tools to learn how to cope with them as they arise, which can greatly reduce any harmful effects.

1. Pause, breathe, and notice

The first tool is the simplest and quickest to implement. Pause, breathe, and notice.

When you feel yourself losing control, getting highly stressed, angry, tense, anxious etc, stop whatever you are doing, sit/stand still, close your eyes (if you can – preferably not while driving), and start to purposefully breathe deeper and slower.

After a few deep breaths (3 or 4), start to notice sensations in your body. Notice the rise and fall of your belly, chest, and shoulders associated with your breathing and use this to slow down your breath even more. Then, start to notice other sensations in your body associated with the stress – tension in your throat, the flutter in your heart, the contraction of various muscles, the anxiety in your belly. Just notice, without trying to change anything or criticize what you are feeling. Just notice.

Do this for as short as a minute if that’s all you’ve got. The more you utilize this tool, the more effective that minute will become.

2. Ground yourself

This is as literal as it sounds. Get to the ground. Take a seat on the ground, place one hand on your heart and the other is placed with the tips of your fingers on the earth.

Close your eyes, breathe, and become aware of every part of your body that is touching the ground. Allow yourself to settle into that support and have faith that you are held in care.

3. Move your body

Go for a walk…

If you have the option, go outside and walk. You can take a long stroll, or simply amble around your property for a few minutes. If your brain is racing in a million different directions, play some soothing music or listen to a podcast. Give your thinking mind a break and your brain a chance to produce some endorphins.

The fresh air will uplift you, the act of walking will refresh your body and mind, and being in nature will allow for perspective, even if only subconsciously.

If you only have a little bit of time, manipulate the situation by noticing everything around you that is beautiful or unique – flowers, bird song, sky, clouds, interesting buildings, rays of light, colors, sweet pets. Again, just notice, without trying to analyse anything.

Dance, shake, flow…

If you can’t go for a walk and you are in a position to look a little strange, then move your body. Dance, shake, do some simple yoga flow or basic stretches. Just move your body.

Again, this will allow your brain to produce some endorphins and it will give your body the opportunity to shift energy toward something uplifting and re-energizing. Hopefully, if you allow yourself to get a little goofy, you will also find the opportunity to smile.

Which brings me to the 4th tool…

4. Smile

Out of all the tools so far, this one will likely feel the strangest and most difficult, but it is effective. Smile.

Close your eyes if you need to or can and just begin to bring a smile to your face. Start small and gradually let it grow. Notice the sensations in your body that come up as you start smiling and allow for them. If you feel weird, inauthentic, or silly, just go with it. Trust the process and do it anyway.

5. Physical touch

Lastly, if you have a loved one near by, ask for a good, tight hug. Not only does physical affection release oxytocin, the love/cuddle hormone, but the physical compression of your body when someone gives you a good squeeze helps to activate your parasympathetic nervous system, the one responsible for down regulating and calming you down.

If you don’t have a human nearby, but perhaps have a pet – yours or someone else’s – go and pet the pet. Giving an animal some physical affection can also release oxytocin, helping you to feel more peaceful and content.

Finally…

These are simple tools that can really help you navigate turbulent situations. Remember to give yourself a break. Life happens and our body feels stress as a way of coping and preparing. What you are trying to do is reduce your reaction to the stressor itself so as not to enhance it to dangerous and counterproductive levels.

With love and joy,

Tara

This post is a product of Wholistic Joy Wellness, integrative wellness coaching. To learn more, click here.